TEEN DATING VIOLENCE; PART TWO

Teen Dating Violence – Part Two

Relative Statistics

By Terry Bailey

Everyone deserves to have a happy, healthy relationship with a member of the opposite sex. Sometimes this happens. All too often warm, friendly relationships turn ugly.

Dating violence happens when one partner in the relationship abuses the other.

Dating violence is about one person exerting power over the other.

Dating violence is much more common than most people believe.

The long term effects can be serious and can have lifelong impact.

Abuse is never the fault of the victim. NEVER! The abuse would like to the abused person to believe they “asked for it” or they “had it coming.” That is never the truth.

Each person in the relationship always, always has the right to say NO to any action up to and including sex. NO means NO! End of discussion. STOP!

Is teen dating violence a real problem? Some parents and adults dismiss talk of dating violence as “kids just fighting.”

Consider these national statistics. Local and state statistics will vary somewhat, but not much.

ï¶One out of three teenagers report they know of a friend who has experienced dating violence.

ï¶One out of four teens report they have been subjected to verbal abuse.

ï¶Ninety-five percent of dating violence is a situation where a boyfriend is abusing a girlfriend.

ï¶Three out of four teens who are assaulted are assaulted by someone they know well.

ï¶Persons aged 12 through 19 are victims of rape and sexual assault at a higher rate than any other age group.

The actual cold hard facts of teen dating violence are hard to determine. Why is that? Consider this:

ï¶ï€ Thirteen percent of teen dating violence and sexual assault are reported to the police.

ï¶ï€ Six percent of assaults are reported to child protective services.

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Five percent are reported to school authorities.
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Eighty-six percent of assaults are never reported. Let me repeat: Eighty-six percent of all teen sexual assaults are never reported.
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Here is a short list of signs of dating violence abuse:

Are your ever afraid of your partner?

Do you often worry about your partner’s mood?

Does your partner control who you see, what you do, and what you wear?

Does your partner call you names, humiliate you, or make you feel guilty?

Has he or she touched you in a way that is uncomfortable and unwanted?

If any of these signs are present in your dating relationship it would be well to talk with someone about it. Talk with your parents, your school counselor or teacher, people from your church or any responsible adult. Most teens say to themselves, “It will get better. It is no big deal.” Almost always any improvement is only temporary and IT IS a big deal.

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Beloit, KS 67420, USA